if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
