I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Randomize
