i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
