they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
