O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
You left your underwear on the fireplace
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
