erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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