Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
He better not be in your backpack
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
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