Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
