So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
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