she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
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we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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