Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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