I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
