For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Randomize
