Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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