How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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