Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
