So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Pants are for mortals
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
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