i just google imaged poop.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
