Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
Randomize
