when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize