I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize
