my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Randomize