i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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