i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
