im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
it was like having sex with a tree stump
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Randomize
