3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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