he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete