I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
