i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
