you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
