i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
