u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
my vag is so smooth its legendary
I should be sponsored by Trojan
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize