well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
