You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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