Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize