What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
