I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Randomize