Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
