Texts From Last Night

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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  what's the vibe there?

  (917): View more from New York City

  extraordinary amounts of gine

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  (814): what's the vibe there? (917): extraordinary amounts of gine http://tfl.nu/dj53
  Replies (11) Good night (1833) Bad night (587)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.

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  (402): Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR. http://tfl.nu/vjij
  Replies (25) Good night (7317) Bad night (860)
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  (914): View more from New York

  I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.

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  (914): I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here. http://tfl.nu/s43y
  Replies (15) Good night (4888) Bad night (1230)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south

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  (561): No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south http://tfl.nu/5xop
  Replies (4) Good night (2523) Bad night (720)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.

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  (412): My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me. http://tfl.nu/dzz5
  Replies (40) Good night (843) Bad night (7615)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm

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  (904): the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm http://tfl.nu/rl73
  Replies (10) Good night (2426) Bad night (1030)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight

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  (619): Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight http://tfl.nu/2z23
  Replies (14) Good night (1791) Bad night (508)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  "drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..

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  (419): "drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again.. http://tfl.nu/1sfp
  Replies (4) Good night (1287) Bad night (451)
• Favorite

  (574): View more from Indiana

  I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.

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  (574): I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both. http://tfl.nu/vmyj
  Replies (4) Good night (1230) Bad night (454)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.

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  (406): Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home. http://tfl.nu/eyf5
  Replies (6) Good night (873) Bad night (431)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed

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  (613): So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed http://tfl.nu/pqem
  Replies (2) Good night (744) Bad night (259)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home

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  (860): Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home http://tfl.nu/znwv
  Replies (1) Good night (670) Bad night (436)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts

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  (203): I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts http://tfl.nu/mdva
  Replies (2) Good night (616) Bad night (281)
• Favorite

  (870): View more from Arkansas

  Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?

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  (870): Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet? http://tfl.nu/5euz
  Replies (1) Good night (300) Bad night (612)
• Favorite

  (862): View more from New Jersey

  This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.

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  (862): This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom. http://tfl.nu/h7oi
  Replies (1) Good night (229) Bad night (380)

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