so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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