So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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