Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
