so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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