that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Randomize
