So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
