I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
