I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
