Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
