Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
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