So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
